Chapter 4:1 The Final Party
< Chapter 3:11 Chapter 4:2 >
August 17, 1989 was going to be my final party. My world was coming to an end. The fear was building. I knew that on Tuesday August 22nd, I was heading for court, and I knew that I was going back to jail. There was no way that I was going to charm my way out of this one. I was facing certain jail time, the loss of my band, my dignity and so much more. On Thursday, August 17th, I decided that I was going out for one last drunk. I was losing everything anyways, so I was going to get good and loaded. That was my focus and I set about to make my plan a reality. Thursday nights were a big night in the bars in Williamsport, PA. There were two clubs just a couple of miles apart that were “party central” on Thursday. Williamsport was about 30 miles from where I was living, so around 7PM I set out to get drunk and get laid. In my mind, I didn't know when I would have the chance to do either again so I was going to make the best of my final party before going to jail. I started bouncing back and forth between the clubs until I found my target. She was a statuesque blonde who I had seen before in the crowd at our performances. I quickly started a conversation with her and we began to party. We drank and danced until the clubs closed for the night. Then she invited me to a party she was going to at her friend’s house. I was already 3/4 of the way to being extremely drunk and I believed that this was my chance to have sex with her. So I got the directions to her friend’s house and headed to the party. I don’t remember much about what happened when I got there, other than I was very drunk, and the way I was acting, my obnoxious, drunken ego wasn’t welcome. So rather than deal with the problems inside the house, she and I sat on the porch and continued to drink and talk. Then something strange happened. She had gone in to get me a beer and one of the guys inside was telling her that I had to leave. She brought me my beer and sat down beside me. I can still see myself opening the can of beer, looking at the top and saying, “I’m finished.” I looked over the edge of the steps and started pouring it on the ground. By the way, when you are hanging out with other heavy drinkers and you pour out their beer, you become VERY unwelcome. The guys inside now started screaming directly at me telling me to get out. She went inside to calm them down, as she was working to get them quiet, I walked to my car and left. The next thing I remember is waking up lying across the front seat of my car in a hotel parking lot somewhere between my home and Williamsport. As my head cleared, I tried to remember how I got there. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t remember. I lay there looking at the overcast sky. A feeling of self-loathing rushed over me as I realized what I had done the night before. It was just over a month since I had been arrested for drunk driving. How could I have done it again? I knew that I was playing Russian roulette with my own life, and the lives of others. Why couldn’t I stop? I sat there enraged with myself. How could I have done it again? It was the same nightmare. It was happening all over again. Wanting to stop, swearing to myself and God that I would quit, and then I would go out and drink myself into a blackout again. But this morning, something was different. What started out as the last party before I went to jail, had truly become my final party.
< Chapter 3:11 Chapter 4:2 >
If you enjoyed this article, help raise the ranking in Google's Search engines by clicking here.
Join the discussion about this article on The Final Party in our Forums
I invite you to follow me on Facebook. You can also follow me on Twitter where I not only post updates, but you will get Inspirational quotes throughout the day.
If the information on this site helps you and you'd like to make a donation to YourDailyLifeCoach.com, please click the Donate button. The amount you contribute is entirely up to you. I am grateful for your support.
Why donate? I want to spend my time directly helping people by creating new video series, blog posts, articles, and podcasts; by speaking to groups; and by working with others to bring you the best content possible. If you want to support me in my mission of creating a community that will elevate the Self Awareness of humanity by providing Inspiration, Education and Empowerment; please make a contribution. Any amount is appreciated.
The Warrior Sage Chapter/SectionWho Is Willard Barth? Author's Notes Preface - Exploring Strength And Weakness Chapter 1:1 - The Process Of Self-Awareness Chapter 1:2 The Stages Of Child Development Chapter 2:1 The World Changed Forever Chapter 2:2 The Vicious Cycle Begins Chapter 2:3 Losing Faith Chapter 2:4 My Dark Secret Chapter 2:5 Where Is The Love I Was Promised? Chapter 3:2 The Road To Alcohol Dependence Chapter 3:3 Leaving My Childhood Behind Chapter 3:4 Escaping Responsibility; The Joy Ride Ends Chapter 3:5 Living A Duality Begins Chapter 3:6 Out Of Control Chapter 3:7 Crossing The Line To Insanity Chapter 3:8 The Black-out Drinking Begins Chapter 3:9 Facing The Music Chapter 3:10 A New Beginning Chapter 3:11 More Lessons To Learn Chapter 4:1 The Final Party Chapter 4:2 A Moment Of Clarity Chapter 4:3 My New Life Begins Chapter 4:4 Sober - Time To Face The World Chapter 4:5 The First Year Of Sobriety Chapter 4:6 Major Change Comes In Year Two Chapter 4:7 My Daughter Is Born April 20, 1992 Chapter 5:1 Life Changing Decisions Follow My Daughter's Birth Chapter 5:2 Recognizing The Voice Inside Chapter 5:3 The Empress Hotel Chapter 5:4 A New Chapter In My Life Begins Chapter 6:1 Finding My Way Home Chapter 6:2 Falling Into Place Chapter 6:3 A New Awareness Chapter 6:4 Personal Finances And Personal Development Chapter 6:5 The George Washington Story Chapter 6:6 Letting Go So Others Can Grow Chapter 6:7 The Wrap Up
For more on personal development and self-awareness visit the Article Archive
Enjoy our series of free videos Self-Awareness 101
Explore the deeper meanings of our Inspirational Quotes
Jump HOME from The Final PartyGet access to a 30 MINUTE EXCLUSIVE FREE VIDEO "The 7 Keys For Success and Fulfillment" by signing up for our FREE Your Daily Life Coach NewsletterSign up for the FREE YDLC newsletter to receive updates about videos and articles designed to assist you on your journey of personal development through self-awareness. When you have confirmed that you want to receive the YDLC newsletter you will be given a link to an Exclusive 30 minute Video that we created just for our subscribers called The 7 Keys for Success and Fulfillment.Newsletters are sent about once a month, just enough to keep you in the loop but not enough to overwhelm you. If you enjoy the free information available on this site, you're sure to appreciate the free newsletter as well. Sign up right here:
New! Comments
Have your say about what you just read! Leave me a comment in the box below.
|